This Doesn't Sound Fun, Does It
An answer came yesterday afternoon from a radiologist unknown to me. Someone who reads for one of the area imaging centers. The answer came in 24 hours which is pretty quickly around these parts. I started my morning in pain, a little grumpy from the lack of sleep combined with the wear that a constant intense ache can bring. I showered and dressed for work. As soon as the clock told me it was eight I called my doctor’s office and left a message for the nurse inquiring bout my test results. I keep my voice kind but I know the nurse can hear my weariness beneath the pleasantries. I leave my cell number, twice in the voice mail. I hang up and start about my day. I hear from a few close friends texting some various forms of strategy for extracting my test results from the offices that hold them captive. I’ve been doing this long enough that I know that no matter what I do, the answers are released when they are ready to do so and I generally start with honey and advance to vinegar as time wears on.
It is early afternoon and I am headed to a clinic North of town. My right hip wails at me as driving aggravates my sciatica and the pain seems to just wrap around my thigh and into my groin when I press on the accelerator. I am anxious to get on the highway and engage the cruise control when my cell rings. My doctors office number displays on the control panel in my car. I pick up with a touch of a button coaxing my warmest tone to the surface...honey. I want answers, I need answers. I find myself secretly relieved to hear the nurse’s voice on the other end. The news must not be so bad I think or the doctor would be delivering it personally. Here it comes. Her tone is serious. She said there are no fractures in my sacrum and the area where my tumor had been remains stable compared to my last MRI (last year). I find my shoulders start to relax. “Well then why does it hurt so bad?” I wonder aloud more than ask. She then goes on to say that the pelvic portion of MRI shows osteonecrosis on both sides. (Necrosis?! Necrosis means dead. Yucky. Not viable. My hip bones are rotting?!) Both femur heads are involved but the right side is much more effected than the left. She reports that it is probably most likely caused by my radiation and chemo but I need to see an orthopedic surgeon as soon as possible. We discuss a few names. My mind is racing and again I miss my bestie sorely. She would know which doctor would be right for the job at hand. What is the job at hand I wonder? I ask the nurse what the treatment might be and she admits readily that she doesn’t know. Ortho isn’t her gig. It’s not mine either. This will be new territory for me.
Before we hang up she said that doctor wanted me to consider something stronger for pain. It’s not going to get better on it’s own. I need to be able to sleep. I acquiesce. I have been so resistant to anything stronger than motrin unless it’s strongly indicated. I don’t resist when she asks this time. The pain has worn me thin and the diagnosis confirms that relief will not come in another way at least for now. We agree on my old friend Percocet and she arranges to have the written script available for me to pick up at the office. In the meantime she will get e scheduled with one of the two surgeons we discussed...first available. We hang up. I call my good friend Erica (my new medical ‘go to’) and we talk through everything and decide we are happy that it is not cancer. I then call my forever friend Marie. We also agree that we are thrilled it is not cancer. None of us know anything about orthopedics but we will just have to “Dr. Google” it later. I call my husband and we just talk briefly but the “happy it’s not cancer” theme continues. I text my kids and it’s one of them that responds with this question. “What’s that?” I explain it as best I can and we decide we are happy it’s not cancer, but that doesn’t mean that this is not a serious side effect. It’s hard to not know what will happen and what treatment might be. Again my mind goes back to the first thought I had when I heard the word osteonecrosis. Necrosis?! Necrosis means dead. Yucky. Not viable. My hip bones are rotting?! This doesn’t sound fun, does it.
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March 17, 2018 at 8:43AM PDT by Private User
ML
I jjust read that Osteonecrosis can also be exacerbated by steroid use so watch for that potential linkage, too.
